Lesson #12: Don't Be Afraid of Not Knowing
I recently found out that I am going back to teaching at my old school (yay!) but I've been told that I will most likely have to teach a different grade and within that different grade I will be teaching Math/Science (I'm kind of, sort of a more language arts/social studies leaning personality).
When I first found out I will probably not be teaching Kindergarten, but instead teaching 2nd grade Bilingual, I was sad. You see, I LOVED teaching Kindergarten! I loved being their first teacher, I loved seeing them grow so much in one year, and I loved that I got them all to myself that year (no switching classes for different subjects). I also have about 10 huge storage boxes full of Kindergarten teaching supplies (property of yours truly) which I will not be able to take with me to my new grade level.
But...that wasn't what was making me the most sad. The thing that was getting to me the most was that I felt a teeny weeny bit of fear creep up over me.
Fear of the unknown.
I have taught Kindergarten and felt like I really learned how to teach for that grade level. I felt confident at that grade level. I had ideas swirling around in my head for things I would do differently this upcoming year, ways I could teach something in a new way, tons of creative projects...all focused on the Kindergarten curriculum. I was actually becoming very excited about it! Now that I will most likely be teaching maths and sciences at the 2nd grade level...GULP...I feel out of my element. And I don't like that feeling.
So...what to do? Take that feeling and use it as a lesson : How to move on when you are fearful. Putting on your big girl pants. Feeling the fear and doing it anyway.
There's a book about that that I should probably pick up right away and read.
|by Susan Jeffers|
So, I'm rethinking my lot in this teaching life of mine. I'm going to start digging into my new role and making the best of it. I won't try to be Super Teacher this year, but I will try to be the best teacher I can. I will work just like I worked my first year of teaching - keeping my head above water and focusing on being present. By the end of next year I might find that I loved this new grade level so much, I won't want to go back. Who knows? Obstacles are placed in our lives to make us better people, with more perspective, more wisdom and more knowledge. Doing the same thing over and over only makes us dull.
As Ms. Jeffers says, "Feel the fear and Do It Anyway". Message received.
“There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure.” - Paolo Coelho, The Alchemist